Be Kind to Others, Self

It is the start of it all: an optimistic belief, a warm smile, a thoughtful gesture, a tender and shared moment. When you can lift someone else’s mood with a simple act, that energy can carry onward and positively influence countless others. You only need to go so far as to connect within to prove this point. How does kindheartedness make you feel? As we perceive the warmth of our good deeds, we want more of that feel-good energy. It is contagious.

Furthermore these sensations prove we have a strong mind-body connection in all that we think, feel and do. Kind acts release physiological endorphins that provide great pain relief. A 2015 study published in the Clinical Psychology Science journal found that relieving the impact of stress on health can be accomplished through helping others. What a beautiful model – a bodily protection, built on healthy behavior, born from a positive thought. If positively driving our own thoughts, feelings and actions make us healthier why not keep it positive?

The real challenge is to get on the kindness train. It’s one thing to display a random act of kindness and quite another to weave this behavior into the fabric of your character. In short, be thoughtful, patient. If you have to remind yourself around every corner to be kind then, eventually, that random act doesn’t become so random anymore. It will be your go-to behavior. Compassion takes practice. Yet the greater it makes you feel, the more likely you will nurture its growth.

The increase of kind devotion will also let you know where others stand. When you come across defensive behavior it is only because others find it difficult to do the same. If you can step back, read their hot-button issues and understand how to apply your positive attention, then you will be one-up on the communication. Besides, there is no better way to get someone to open to a better way than to be a model of that way.

Look to a child. An easy barometer of our behavior is to notice how it affects a child. There are fewer filters and defenses built within a young lad. What you see is what you get. It can be rewarding when a youngster reflects and models our positive behavior. Yet if we approach their space with the accumulation of our angst or unpleasantness they will become an uncomfortable tell of our conduct. Don’t bury that information! Learn from it to better yourself.

Everywhere you go is a clean slate, an opportunity to be an upper, to be decent to others, to feel good about yourself. Imagine walking into a room or any place that has never experienced the likes of you. There are no expectations for your behavior. It is an open canvas for your expressions. How would you like to be heard, viewed, felt, or included? Would you want that same treatment from others? When we carry forward what makes us feel good we interconnect others to those experiences. Make those experiences hold the best of you, a new idea of self.

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